101 Ways To Say NO Presented by Vuarnet International 617/527.oo91 --------------------- 01. I have to floss my cat 02. I've dedicated my life to linguine 03. I want to spend more time with my blender 04. The President said he might drop by 05. I've been schedule for a karma transplant 06. The man on the T.V. told me to stay tuned 07. I'm staying home to work on my cottage chesse sculpture 08. It's my parakeet's bowling night 09. It wouldn't be fair to the other Beautiful People 10. I,m building a pig from a kit 11. I did my own thing and now have to undo it 12. I,m enrolled is aerobic scream therapy 13. There's a distrubance in the force 14. I'm doing door-to-door collecting for static cling 15. I have to go to the post office to see if I'm still wanted 16. I'm teaching my farrot to yodel 17. I have to check the freshness dates on my dairy products 18. I'm going thru cherry chesse cake withdrawals 19. I'm planning to go downtown to try on gloves 20. My crayons all melted together 21. I'm trying to see how long I can go without saying yes 22. I'm in training to be a household pest 23. I'm getting my overalls overhauled 24. My patent is pending 25. I'm attending the opening of my garage door 26. I'm sandblasting my oven 27. I'm worried about my vertical hold 28. I'm going down to the bakery to watch the buns rise 29. I'm being deported 30. The grunion are running 31. I'll be looking for a parking lot 32. My Millard Fillmore Fan Club meets then 33. The monsters haven't turned blue yet,and I have to eat more dots 34. I'm taking punk totem pole carving 35. I have to fluff my shower cap 36. I'm converting my calendar watch from Gregorian to Jullian 37. I've come down with a real horrible case of something or other 38. I've made an appointment with a cuticle specialist 39. My plot to take over the world is thickening 40. I have to fullfill my potential 41. I don't want to leave my comfort zone 42. It's to close to the turn of the century 43. I have some real hard words to look up in the dictionary 44. My subcconscious says no 45. I'm giving nuisance lessons at a convenience store 46. I left my body in my other clothes 47. The last time I left I never came back 48. I've got a Friends of Rutabaga meeting 49. I have to answer all my "occupant" letters 50. None of my socks match 51. I have to be on the next train to Bermuda 52. I'm have all my plants neutered 53. People are blaming me for the Spanish-American war 54. I changed the locks on my doors and now I can't get out 55. I'm making a home movie called "The thing that grew in my refrigerator" 56. I'm attending a perfume convention as a guest sniffer 57. My Yucca plant is feeling yucky 58. I'm touring China with a Wok band 59. My chocolate-appreciation class meets that night 60. I never go out on day that end in "y" 61. My mothe would never let me hear the end of it 62. I'm running off to Yugoslavia with a foreign-exchange student named Basil Metabolism 63. I just picked up a book called "Glue in Many Lands" and I can't put it dowm 64. I'm to old/young for that stuff 65. I have to wash/condition/perm/curl/tease/torment my hair 66. I have to much quilt 67. There are important world issues I have to worry about 68. I have to draw "Chubby" for an art scholarshipp 69. I'm uncomfortable when I'm alone or with someone else 70. I promised a friend I'd help him fold road maps 71. I feel a song coming on 72. I'm trying to be less popular 73. My bathroom tiles need regrouting 74. I have to bleach my hare 75. I'm waiting to see if I'm already a winner 76. I'm writing a love letter to Tony Geary 77. You know how we psychos are 78. My favorite commercial is on TV 79. I have to study for a blood test 80. I'm going to be old someday 81. I've been traded to Cincinnati 82. I'm observing National Apathy Week 83. I have to rotate the crops 84. My uncle escaped again 85. I'm up to my elbows in yellow waxy buildup 86. I have to knit some dust bunnies for a charity bazaar 87. I'm having my baby shoes bronzed 88. I have to go to court for kitty litering 89. I'm going to count the bristles on my toothbrush 90. I have to thaw some karate chops for dinner 91. Having fun gives me prickly heat 92. I'm going to the Missing Persons Bureau to see if someone is looking for me 93. I have to jog my memory 94. My palm reader advised against it 95. My "Dress for Obscurity" class meets then 96. I have to stay home and see if I snore 97. I prefer to remain an enigma 98. I think you want the OTHER_______(your name)______ 99. I have to sit up with a sick ant 100.I'm trying to cut down 101.....well maybe -/Vuarnet International/- 617/527.oo91 24oo-16.8k HST/V32bis